emotions

I'm not always sure what to do with emotion.  It takes me by storm, reminds me of those things I suppress somewhere deep inside me most days.  Reminds me that I'm not so very strong, not so very brave, and not so very self-sufficient.  Emotion reminds me of my susceptibility, of my vulnerability, of my very humanity.  Emotion, that intangible quality that defines most if not all aspects of my life blurs my focus, clouds my vision, and disorients me.  

Emotion often takes the place of reality.  When I feel something, it doesn't need to be real, because perception is reality.  When emotion defines me and the way I perceive my relationships with others, life becomes very empty indeed.  Emotion is that thing which fuels affection and connection, but it also threatens to replace those very affections and connections.  Unchecked, emotion becomes a wild weed that drowns out everything it touches.  

Once this has happened, I come to depend on emotion.  Emotion is not only a drug, it becomes the only connection I have to the world, my friends, and to God.  Emotion keeps me from the concrete reality, keeps me from action, blinds me to the reality of my immobility.  Emotion deceives me; I feel alive, but am never so far from it as I am when overcome with emotion.

Unchecked, emotion destroys.