sometimes i think i'm loving when i'm not loving at all...
Failure to love, not because of the evident lack of emotion, but because of the lack of sacrifice. I am not required to love in emotion, but in word and in deed. Then, perhaps, emotion can be. Boldly speak the truth in love. Love in word and in deed. Love is patient, love is kind, it does not envy, it does not boast, it is not rude, it is not self seeking, it keeps no record of wrongs. love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. love always protects. love never ends.
lack of humility, tendency to hold another to a standard which I repeatedly fail. selfish desire to give up, to "love" through deception of both myself and another.
what if what someone needs is the truth - not for any reason of my own benefit, but rather that i may more fully love them in word and in deed? what does this look like? how do i love in WORD and DEED? this is the question of which I must pursue the answer, at the risk of a lifetime of regret.
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