welcome to resistance

I've been doing a great deal of thinking lately.

What is true religion? "To look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself unpolluted by the world." (or something like that, the end of James 1)

My faith/religion has always been somewhat inward. Some of the only times I reach out or share my faith are in Christian environments. Where it's safe and even expected. Where am I called to go? To the unreached.

I have come to a place where I need to make a choice. Am I going to continue pursuing this inward, emotion based religion unsupported by real action in a lost world? That cannot continue to define my life.

It's so easy to be intimidated, or to feel inferior. It's so easy to feel like my faith will not be accepted by my peers and to feel as if somehow I don't have something worth sharing. This mindset is a tragedy, and I can't live that way anymore. If I'm going to claim Christianity, I do not want to claim cheap grace. I don't want to routinely fail to be a light in a dark world and then fall back on grace. I believe I am being called to jump, to trust that my God is big enough to carry me.

God, give me the grace and strength to follow You to the dark corners, to the forgotten, to those who will never accept me, to those who will condemn me. Be my strength, be my passion, be my joy. I truly have no hope of doing this without You.

Welcome to resistance...